woensdag 25 januari 2012


Don't tell me that ist's time to go solo.
You need to have a sitdown with your ego!

One of my friends just told me I'm not special.
I prefer to think I'm uniek. A one of a kind.
I'm different
But so is she, that's why were friends.

This all about a stupid misscomunication.
My intentions are always good.
But my way of handeling things isn't.

I just don't think it's fair.

vrijdag 20 januari 2012


I'm on my way to breda.
And at this moment I should be really happy.
But I'm not!
I saved myself from a half year of hell.
I was increadeble happy and enthousiast.
Until I called my dad.

Why can't he just be happy for me?
Why can't he just be happy for me??

I spend half this ride crying.
Impressing for someone who barely ever cries.
Normaly I first get mad and than I start crying.
Now I cried, and just feeling hurt.

On moments like this I wonder why I even live.
Where the hell do I live for?
Why did my parents even bring me in this world?
It's not like they wanted me anyway.

They wanted this little boy, who likes football.
Bud they got a girl, a fashion girl.
Who loves to make music and put on make-up.
They just can't indentify themselfs with me.

My eyes hurt from the stupid crying.

donderdag 19 januari 2012

Moments too late

Were moments away, moments away.
Just seconds too late.

Sometimes I don't see a future for us.
Most of the time I wonder why were together.
Right now, I'm just thinking to much.
When I'm with you...
I'm sceared your gonna leave.

This is me, can you handle it?
I hope you can!

woensdag 11 januari 2012


No I won't agree, and I'm not ok with it.
Xtc and cocaine.
I'm worry about my friends.

When I hear my classmates talk about it.
All I think is: it isn't a game.
That shit means trouble.
Theire just careless, they don't know.

They don't know:
How it hurts
How it takes
How it burns
How it breaks

And in a way I'm happy they don't know.
It just frustrates me some times.

It's just hard to see how the drugs take everything.

vrijdag 6 januari 2012


Sometimes I think it's a dream.
Sometimes am sceared it's all a game.
Sometimes I view my own facebook just to
See the words 'in a relationship with'
I just can't believe your mine.

I've never been so sceared to lose someone.
I've never been this jealous.
It's a whole new world.
No games.
He's just a really good guy.

And his friends, I like them.

Today we had our first disagreement.
But there is a good explination for it.
I'm gonna tell him.
If he wants to hear it or not.

dinsdag 3 januari 2012


Things are really getting out of line in my head.
Now and than I love everything. 
Most of the time, I just hate life.
I hate me.
And because me is bad, but because me sucks.

My friends, if I can even call them friends.
They hate me at the moment. 
I don't know why, guess because I suck.

My family already hates me.
More than they already did, how is it possible?

The meds the drugs they don't work against these feelings.
I'm all alone, no one will understand me.

It's hard to know you need to get high because 
you can't handle your real emoticons.

The sad part is that I choose this way.
I choose to be me. 
And that everyone hates me for that.
It's a thing I have to live with.